Head Space Daily Words...

Fifteen years ago I saw Aston Villa play against Chelsea beneath the Twin Towers, in what was to be the last FA Cup Final staged at the old Wembley Stadium. It was the first time the Villa had played in the FA Cup Final for forty-three years, when we beat Manchester United 2-1, with two well-taken goals from Peter McParland. The images of Johnny Dixon – Villa’s captain – carried shoulder high, are reminders of a by gone era, former glories and the joy that winning the FA Cup can bring (see below.) The win in 1957 was the seventh time Villa had lifted the trophy and remained the highest number of FA Cup victories until Spurs passed it in 1991.

At the 2000 Final I was 26 years old, living in Brixton and a season ticket holder in the Lower Holte End. Life was exciting, full of expectation and I was making my way in the world, accompanied by optimism, an ever growing record collection and big nights out. At the 2015 final tomorrow, I will be 41 years old, living in South East London and grateful if I can make it to ten matches a season, along with my two boys, currently aged thirteen and ten. Expectations of life have been replaced with a determination to get by and optimism has turned into realism. The record collection grows ever larger, whilst big nights out are as rare as rocking horse doo-doo.

As life has changed and moved on, one constant presence has been Aston Villa Football Club, with its eternal ability to frustrate, yet always offer a glimmer of hope and better times ahead. This season sums the club up. The team has lost a grand total of 20 league matches and underwent a horrendous goal scoring drought. The style of football was so utterly dull the club should have been paying the supporters to come and watch, yet after looking seemingly destined for Championship football next season, the new manager, Tim Sherwood, has turned things around. He has instilled belief in the players to play positive, direct, attacking football, which has kept us in the Premier League and by helping the team reach the FA Cup Final, the 2014/15 season could end up becoming the greatest since 1982, when Villa lifted the European Cup. Football certainly is a funny old game.

Before the 2000 FA Cup Final I met up with friends at a pub in West Hampstead and not being the biggest drinker, was already well gone by the time I made it to the ground. A tradition of FA Cup Finals is for the hymn Abide With Me to be played and sung before the match. I am not big on my religious songs and the only three words I know to Abide With Me are in fact, “abide with me” but it is such an emotive song and so connected with the moments before the kick off of a Cup Final that it gets me every time. Tomorrow will be no exception and I will be belting out those three words with gusto and a lump in my throat.

My overriding memory of the 2000 Final is one of utter disappointment. It is without a doubt my worst day in football. The team was fearful and played with no adventure. In truth, it was a poor game of football. At that time Villa had finished sixth in the league, whilst Chelsea were a rising force, who had finished fifth and were three years away from being taken over by Roman Abramovich. Some kind of romantic football notion had led me to believe that Villa would win the FA Cup on that day, taking into account our history in the competition and it being the last final to ever be played at the old Wembley. Looking back this was obviously a foolish reason on which to build my hopes of victory, as it quite simply comes down to who plays best on the day.

At the final whistle I can remember being so disgusted with the team’s performance that I shouted my disapproval at the fans who were giving the players a standing ovation and I stormed off – still somewhat drunk. My memories of the evening that followed are sketchy but I can remember ringing the doorbells of several posh houses in Hampstead and running away. I also remember looking up at Big Ben and the huge pale yellow clock face, as I said my farewells to people I had been hanging out with. My girlfriend (now my wife) apparently came home to find me asleep on the settee with a pizza carton across my chest and the only words she could get out of me were, “they let me down, the boys let me down.”

Tomorrow will be a very different story. Aston Villa is the serious underdog against an extremely strong, in form Arsenal team, who will be expected to win. The day is about enjoyment, savouring the atmosphere, relishing the occasion. We are not there to simply make up the numbers though. This is a Cup Final and anything can happen. The itinerary for me and my boys will be a meal at Nandos in London Bridge, before going to meet a couple of friends, one of whom I went to the Final with in 2000, in a pub on Finchley Road. After a drink or two we will tube it to Wembley Park, venture up Wembley Way and make our way to our seats. The Villa fans will be exceptional as they always are away from home.

Due to the number of times Aston Villa have won the trophy coupled with the length of time it has been since we were last Champions, the FA Cup has become a Holy Grail for the club. For many years, I would rather us win the FA Cup than the Premier League; and as the years have gone by, the actual chances of winning the League have become zero, with the only hope to be bought by a multi billionaire who can buy the title. That is not football, that is not sport. So, for me the FA Cup is the last bastion of competitive football and on the basis of a one off game, the odds can be overturned. The Twin Towers have long since been replaced at Wembley by The Arch, which is a symbol of modern football and tomorrow I travel with hope, rather than expectation but as long as the boys don’t let me down, that is good enough for me, win or lose.